"No matter where you go, there you are"

Backstory: from graduating college in 2010 to 2016 I held office jobs in agencies and lived in Minnesota (basically) my whole life. Since being a kid I felt compelled and curious to see the world and understand other cultures, but I never made it a priority so it never happened. When I was 27 and had only been out of the country a couple times, I made a huge leap to go on a round the world trip solo for 6 months. Since, it's been a complete lifestyle change working remote and living in Rome.

*****Disclosure: I’ m adding this years later after rereading this article. ‘Traveling’ especially solo relies on so many privileges, considering passport, race, nationality, family, being able bodied, and more. I was thinking of deleting this post now that I look back at it considering the level of blissful ignorance! But I guess I will leave it here as it captures a moment of time. Just know that if you are reading this, my mindset has changed!!!! Thanks!!!*******

Recently I read a lengthy visual article on Medium titled "Travel Is No Cure For the Mind" explaining the logic behind why travel cannot fix the mental barriers you must cross to achieve true happiness. If you don't have time to read all of it the general gist is: you might find monotony in your daily life working at an office, so decide to travel. It starts as a few trips, and ends up with actually moving to another country, then in time you inevitably need to find a job again and end up in the same dreadful monotony but with different scenery.

The article concludes with how you must appreciate your current surroundings to be truly free and happy in the mind, that traveling essentially has no affect on this.

However, I believe the experience of travel cultivates momental life changing skills if you let it. Maybe the author of this article found themselves in a similar monotonous pattern after moving somewhere else, but each situation is unique. Leaving your routine all together in one form or another allows a reevaluation and consideration like no other. You are more comfortable taking those right risks. When there’s no path ahead, you are in full control of your destiny with all your usable attention energy to create something meaningful. Isn't meaning one step above happiness?

Actually it was the common phrase you see written across sunsets shared on FB, "No matter where you go, there you are" that I tried to force myself to believe when feeling stuck being broke and also with only literally 5 days of vacation a year while my best friends were living/having meaningful experiences in other countries across the world.

The issue I see now with this phrase is that it can be interpreted suggesting it's not worth traveling (or trying a lifestyle change) because there's a cap to who you can be, there's a limit to your personality and you cannot work through inner struggles with outer circumstances, similar to what the author of the Medium article was writing. This interpretation is encouragement for mediocrity and simplifies the human experience as something linear and doesn't recognize our ability to grow into completely different lifestyles that in the long run benefits society. Certainly, you will be everywhere you are, that's a good thing. The more present you can be in the now, the more understanding you have of who you are and your place in the world. The world needs more people that think for themselves and have the energy and time to consider how the world might be improved.

No matter what logical reason, graphical explanations or number of times we tell ourselves a phrase over and over, mental barriers sometimes need to be crossed with physical manifestations too.

Let's be honest, isn't it a way more convenient solution to suggest all our problems can be fixed solely in our minds?

Can travel cure a mind? or wherever you go, there you are?

For me, the cliche of leaving my office job for a round the world trip wasn't some external temporary period of time that I returned from and resumed the same day to day as before as was the plan. Instead, it was a physical action that propelled the next chapter in my life I was meant to live. The next chapter didn't include allegiance to an ineffective 9-5 lifestyle devoting my time and energy to another company with the carrot of security and retirement funds. The next chapter included owning my own content, taking risks, creating things, and living in a never-ending state of curiosity. I can soon enter my 30's location independent building meaningful things with potential to generate income for my retirement. That's a risk I wouldn't have taken before my trip, but it's a risk I can't imagine not taking now and my days have an unprecedented sense of meaning and adventure.

As we are all connected, as one person’s revelation is connected to another’s, my story sounds cliche because it is. The reason I’m writing this is because I think many others can relate. Just as someone else’e cheesy story is what made me feel confident to take that risk, maybe someone stumbling on this one day will be confident in themselves too.

So in list form...

How traveling actually DID cure my mind:

Travel took me out of routine— I was able to see my life choices from more of an objective birds eye view, and pay attention to what felt natural and what didn't (for example, waking up to an alarm 71% of my life with an immediate necessity to physically go to a different place never felt natural, and I never miss it. Unless I have something new and exciting to wake up for, I'm now able to wake up naturally after a complete sleep cycle and take sometimes hours to process and meditate on my intent for the day. Sleep is so important to health and happiness!)
Travel made me excited to learn again— I didn't realize how numb and simple my brain was starting to mush to until I had opportunity to challenge it again. In high school and college I was so focused on self-guided learning. I'd watch countless documentaries and switch captions and voices on movies between english/spanish/french simply for fun. Curiosity and excitement to learn was inherently a part of me, but after working in the routine of office life without many challenges or threat to comfort in my day made my learning processes dulled. After work I just wanted to have a half glass of wine and zone out to the latest Netflix obsession. I just wanted to be entertained, but I never really felt like I was using my skills toward moving my life forward too. Now, I'm so CURIOUS and am so aware of all that I don't know. I'm learning Italian and Azeri, and am generally interested in other languages too just because it's fun. I still enjoy a few episodes of a show at the end of the night, but now it feels like a truly satisfying rest from living my day with intention.
Travel made me closer to my family— I know this doesn't make much sense, but I used to live a 20 minute drive to my sister's family, and 1.2 hr drive to my parents. Sometimes, we'd go months without even talking on the phone. On the contrary, while traveling and also now while living in Rome we make it a point to videochat at least once a month, and when we do talk there's more meaning and significance. We listen more, we care more. Of course, there are also downsides which I'll mention in the next section.
Travel taught me how to take risks— I used to take sort of ‘pretend’ risks, for example dye my hair a color a zany color, or try a new medium when painting. But it always felt these these took the place of the ‘real’ risks a truly wanted to take. Who knows, maybe little risks can slowly build confidence. But I would repeatedly get really close to making a big lifestyle switch then back out. I've since learned with risk can come great reward, and it has brought be much confidence in my decisions and abilities to try for things I might be scared of.
Travel let me strengthen friendships with people from my past— When you are hyper aware of your physical location in the world, life looks different. Anyone you mildly know in that same physical location as you are so special. The BEST part of my trip was truly all the people I spent it with. I am blessed to have known people from all over and rarely had to feel like a complete outsider staying at a hostel. It was so meaningful to have opportunity to get to know these people more, and go from acquaintance to friends.
Travel helped my fear of flying, plus my anxiety and depression was absent. Before leaving I was legit afraid of flying. It was something that built as I got older, and more worrisome. Now, while it’s still something I can’t say I love, there is the ability to see a flight as relaxing, almost meditative. It's the one time you can rest your brain without any responsibility.
Travel helped me learn humility. While this article is pretty heavy on the confident and arrogant side, my experiences making mistakes and being utterly embarrassed were really healthy. (This point I added in 2021 because reading this article is a bit cringey, ha!)

I'm sure there's more, but those are the big ones.

It would be highly one sided and dishonest if I wrote all the ways travel cured my mind if I didn't mention the ways it didn't. So...

How traveling discouraged my mind:

Traveling means you miss out on important events with family and friends— Thought I'd get the obvious one out of the way. It was kind of heartbreaking to have to Skype with my niece on her birthday like some digital talking avatar. It's hard to see your family and friends on social media experiencing things together and feeling left out, like traditions or seasons you used to celebrate.
Traveling means you'll loose friends— Before I left, I felt like I had several fun networks of friends I could comfortable meet up with at a bar or party and legit feel welcome. However when you're gone for so long and are busy that whole time, it's hard to reach out to people and no one reaches out to you, and soon a lot of friends start to seem like acquaintances, and by the time you're back in town you feel kind of shy to reach out to them. Despite everyone’s good intentions, sometimes it just doesn’t work out unfortunately. It’s very common for people that travel long term to suffer from loneliness, despite maybe their happy instagram photos on the beach.
Traveling means you learn how no one really cares— I know this sounds incredibly negative, but hear me out. While going to new exciting places and meeting new people, I rarely felt lonely. I only felt this when I returned and assumed family and friends were curious about my time, but no one expressed interest to see any photos! I had been anticipating maybe hooking up my laptop to the tv and explain things in detail, and maybe that would have happened if all the variables lined up just right, but the reality is no one can really care that much. But how could they? You can't imagine or relate to these experiences, how does it benefit you? And wouldn't that take F O R E V E R to go through the hundreds of photos?! That doesn't sounds fun at all.

Despite these challenges from travel, I still think the benefits (in personal development) outweigh.

Contrary to the Medium article, I would argue that travel can in fact 'Cure the Mind' because it takes you out of the day to day routine of giving your usable attention energy to someone else, reveals the great reward in taking meaningful risks, and teaches invaluable skills and perspectives that can propel you into the life you're supposed to be living.

No matter where you go, there you are learning and creating and carving a new life path.

Thanks for reading,
Danielle

Hello world, welcome to my first blog post. I wanted to start collecting my (many) thoughts from experiences with design, traveling, and maybe whatever else comes up.

If you know me, you know I'm a huge fan of notebooks. Blank notebooks, notebooks with lines, notebooks with preprinted to-do categories. If I'm surrounded by ways to write, sketch, work through and come up with new thoughts, I feel at ease. Like anything is possible.

However, scribbles on pages can be vulnerable. They can be lost, stolen, dunked in water, set on fire, set in jello, you name it. So here's the beginning of a digital notebook. The goal is to be organized, have tags, images, memories, be searchable-! I'm quite excited.

You also may know my tendency to write accidental novels when explaining something. *face palm* So another goal of this blog is to try to improve my writing skills and be more intentional and clever with words. Wish me luck.

On that note, to kick off this new platform I want to share some lessons learned after living here in Rome for the first 4 months (collectively). It might be educational to some, helpful to others, and probably a bit amusing to revisit in a year.

16 Lessons from Living in Rome:

The pizza really is amazing, and make sure to ask for it "calda." IMO hot pizza is best pizza.
You will find yourself no more than 3 blocks from a pizzeria or bar at any given moment.
A "Bar" isn't what you might assume. Think coffee & pastries as a focus rather than desperation & noise.
It's best to assume no one you interact with speaks English, learn a few words first to get by. (And be pleasantly surprised when you're wrong)
When checking out, "Busta?" = Do you want a bag? while, "Basta?" = Is that everything? (It makes people confused if you answer the latter with "no" and an assuring smile + long pause.)
If going out in the world to complete a task, just assume you will encounter an obstacle. (maybe it's national holiday you hadn't heard of? Maybe ALL transportation is on strike? Maybe the office closes every Tuesday from 11am to 4pm?)
Italians can be quite friendly and strike up conversation at stores, which makes you feel guilty if you have to tell them you don't speak much Italian. (So get on that!)
If at the main train station Termini, cling to your phone with padlocks to ensure you keep it.
The touristy spots are pristine, but if you go past these areas in the city you may find billowing trash and what happens when most dog owners don't clean up after their furry friends on the sidewalk. (Watch where you step.) But there's enough beauty to balance it out.
If you know the basics of Spanish and French, you'll be surprised with how much Italian you understand.
Crushed tomatoes are best purchased in glass jars.
Making Italian pasta sauce isn't complicated. Simply heat olive oil and add salt + (quality) crushed tomatoes. Stir once and simmer until the oil integrates with the tomato, maybe 10-15 min.
A bottle of quality local wine can be under 2.5 USD. That doesn't mean you need to buy wine every chance you get.
There is a popular clothing brand here with giant letters, "PYREX." It is not the Corning tupperware containers, though those containers are dope so I want one of these t-shirts for this reason.
You might see something very ornate and old next to something very tacky and new.
Rome is a never ending source of beauty, history, colors, botanics, cats, friendliness, pastries, fresh produce, cheap wine, and therefore inspiration! So appreciate every day; take time to step away from the computer to be aware of the environment and just exist in it.

Maybe in a year from now this list will be different; maybe it will have significant edits. Time will tell. In the meantime I hope to spend the time ahead in awareness and appreciation of where I am. It's my first time living in a different country, a long-time life goal of mine. Wish me luck.

If anyone has suggestions, questions, comments, etc. don't hesitate to reach out!

Below are some more photos from life here.

Thanks for reading,
Danielle